A time to …

I know, an entire month. Please bear with our creative thoughts through this difficult time of covered up style and harsh dry winds.

But really though?

A month later?

At times like this, when despite my best efforts (I mentally drafted at least five possible posts) there is not a single thing to show for said planning and trying to put a post up.

None, of my ‘vibesy’ styling ideas on ‘how to transition summer looks to winter looks’, or ‘the best gift ideas or plans’ for the season, or my guide to ‘picking up from scratch and deciding to be an interiors decorator’; all figments of my blogging imagination which never quite made it to the blog.

And all of which point to the only thing that I hate about writing; that it takes time.

I guess, who doesn’t need more time?

Perhaps the trick is knowing what to do and at what time, and accepting that whatever falls outside of those margins was simply not meant to play out. It’s as my mother often reminds me ‘there’s a time for everything’.

So here is some way of a compromise, with something else other than my seemingly endless rambling about writing (well everything that goes on to enable my writing or otherwise not writing). 

Below is my sort-of draft/mood-board for all of the interiors decorating ideas I’ve been pulling inspiration from because your ‘girl’ got herself a new place. 

Let the real fun begin, *winks and proceeds to fall back to sleep*.

Ebun,

xxx

Know yourself

 I recently came across an Instagram post shared by one of my faves, it was in that new style of interacting between brand and users on zie social media. ‘My faves’ were looking to their community of followers to engage on the topic of ‘advising your former/younger self’. 

And I kinda bookmarked this social experiment for future reference only to never really go back to it as is the bedrock of this adulating journey; needing coping mechanisms and having a short attention span (or maybe that’s just me?)

Anyways, it stuck enough to pop up over here. And it did begin to get me into that reflective, searching mode. The sort of mode that tends to spur on my more life centred, ‘feeling like I’m woke’ posts which I had promised myself would move on over to the Medium page, so there’s more space for loving on some red bottoms and talking about my sashimi tasting experiences on here.

 

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(You know Christian Louboutin really stays out here busy, with his dreamy shoes every season, but we all only credit that bit of red on the soles!!!)

So I know you aren’t really here for me rambling. 

So imma keep it real brief ( in my faux American accent). 

Basically, if I were ever to tell my younger self a thing on this thing called life, it would be to “Go confidently”.

Okay I lied, here is the ramble-ey bit, which I kind of fell onto whilst I was talking to a friend about my relationship with my writing, and just things I’d come to discover about myself through writing, like having to grow up from not really enjoying the process at first to finding what I most enjoy about it.

It feels like as I’ve grown older, or rather matured (like fine wine) from a younger me, so too has my writing, and my styling and my thinking amongst a whole host of other things; although these are probably the ones I take the most pride in. In fact everything that I immediately think of about myself seems to have grown into a better version of itself. And no, I’m not being big-headed. I really think this is something most people can sort-of credit themselves with doing, and that is growing with time.

And if all that good stuff is going to happen to my self-growth as a person anyway, there is absolutely no reason for me to ever have in the past cut myself to size because I felt that I ‘was not enough’.

The growth will come, the better will come, with time and work. I might as well start enjoying the benefits of that sooner rather than later.

Now imagine if Christian Louboutin had sat in that Milan office and thought, designing shoes is one thing but a streak of red on every shoe will be laughed out of the Vogue September issue?

Ebun,

xxx

 

p.s. (Thank you David – you know who you are – for partly inspiring this post!)

For rainy days

I’ve decided tonight that I am a writer, and putting even the tiniest bit on the post, for now, is better than nothing, even as the world around us slowly falls apart.

From the global warming sceptics even in the face of a month-long sequence of natural disasters across the worlds largest continent and also home to a majority of these sceptics, the irony; to the finale episode of Insecure and it’s heart-wrenching final three minutes of a fairytale that could have been; to the repeated perversion of Justice systems in America to not taking a stand against police brutality towards the black community. This September, it all plays out in Saint Louis, Missouri.

Then there are the painful reminders that it is no longer summer.

Well, I finally got around to making a start on a Medium page last weekend which was when I last got a chance to go through the paces with my creative bad self.

And it appears my creative bad self, needed another outlet for the more responsible, socially aware side that takes me a little out of my comfort zones of merino wool, 3000 cotton thread counts ( I wish) and coffee table books ( I know I still owe you an interiors post).

There’s so much I’ve come to learn about myself, and the world around me from writing so damn much. And apparently, I’m dragging you along for the ride with me?

So here’s the Medium and here’s to hoping I finally get this week’s posts out as a final trip down the summery lane?

 

Ebun,

xxx

Pair me up

And we’re back! With one more of those our grand styling tips that should hopefully take us to our eventual Chloe Sevigny aesthetics.

As usual, the lead-up to these posts involves a copious amount of trawling the internet, some fitting room mayhem but always finally, a moment of shopping clarity, as I realise that the little tweaks here and there are what make all the difference in putting together a look.

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So, with Chloe Sevigny aesthetics as our agenda this past week, I’ve bought a thing or two  … or three, all thanks to some earlier summer thriftiness which we hint about in that last post. And I picked up on a little something that I am pretty sure we all mostly do in the middle of shopping for new wardrobe additions? Which is pairing our wardrobe additions with bits from our regular wardrobe?

But I also picked up on how this super simple process tends to stop in the shops? I personally tend to stop thinking of pairing items in my wardrobe when they’re no longer new additions.

Cherieby d (1)

However, to really maintain those perfect outfit combinations, it probably pays to think of your wardrobe items, old and new as pairs or even groups, and arrange your wardrobe accordingly.

It’s a process a lot of bloggers stick by for the long-run as opposed to the short-run, and it is evident in their wardrobe layouts where things are very much together, where there is that nude dress hung up next to that ivory blazer, and that indigo denim next to the black sweatshirt.

Well, that’s it. Chloe Sevigny, here we come!

Cherieby d

 

Ebun,

xxx

Massimo Dutti, Pre-fall’17

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Question.

Surely no one thinks mid-way through starting a lifestyle blog on all things stylish and all matters of shopping importance, that they are going to experience a dry spell? It really can’t be that hard?

But even though I have recently been literally “wearing less and going out more” as that familiar Drake line goes on Hotline bling, I now get to shop a little bit more in this month of August right when Spring/Summer is nearly out of the shop floors and there are exciting new bits coming in for next season Autumn/Winter. Sometimes patience has its rewards.

But I also get to look back a little wishful and all, that I had not bought that pair of Palazzo Pants from the Massimo Dutti this summer?

Sticking a whole lot of closely to my self-confessed ‘perfect guide to guilt free shopping’, I tend to leave behind in the stores what I have no plans of wearing to any particular place. And these beautiful blue trousers just happened to fall into that category. Sometimes being patient means no pants. So bear that in mind, all you non-nudists.

The Massimo Dutti, both for these blessed blue pants and other reasons, has been a firm favourite of mine this season and they feature in my last wardrobe update, so chances are you will probably be seeing and hearing more from me about them.

Cherieby d

For now though, here is a peek at their recent Limited edition collection, which I’ve been tweeting my love for.

 

Limited Edition Massimo Dutti'17 h

As we get to just the last month or so of summer, hope you’ve all been able to squeeze as much fun, love, shopping and light out of these past few months of long days!

Ebun,

xxx

Good Vibes

Good Vibes

Wondering where I’ve been these past few weeks?

Do I even get to keep my #teamblogger badge without finessing the art of posting regularly and sharing all of the exciting things going on around me?

Well, all of these are important questions for another day #clickbait.

But for now, here’s a little reflective something for you, which partly goes back to those questions, because believe it or not, even when I’m not writing on here, I am frantically gathering stories, and ideas, and thoughts to make one perfect post.

Today, I shared a bit of a tongue in cheek tweet about ‘positive space’.

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And however jokey it was, it was pretty key to both how my weeks have played out and also the theme of this post. 

As increasingly this week, I have stumbled on even more people, discussions, and poignant reminders of how universal life’s themes can be. How we can each experience life over completely different events to each other, but how, what these boil down to emotionally is a connecting theme for all of us.

I’m sure we’ve all at some point or another, experienced what it is to feel happy, or sad, optimistic, or defeated.

Well, whether we are happy, or sad, disappointed or otherwise; I’ve found that the right environments can hugely influence what we know to do / can do in any of those different emotional states.

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And certainly listening to the relatable wisdom of these inspirational sisters helps. Jade and Leia on the Gettin Grown podcast have been an encouraging voice through my week, and I found myself getting fully swept into their overall vibe of positivity and #realtalk.

 

*sprinkles black girl magic to present this soundcloud staple on the blog*

Beauty Update

Two posts in two days?!

I can’t believe it either.

It seems my head is in a screwed on, no 99 problems to worry about, state. And this probably has something to do with getting some good good … face loving this week (lol, you thought it was something else).

 

Facials, sound like something from a Beverly Hills yummy mummy’s playbook, so as you can imagine, I hadn’t really looked to them as the solution to the skin problems I’d developed over this year.

As with most spas that you get in urban areas as opposed to some rural retreat type area; because it’s hardly some natural paradise, there is a lot of effort put into the luxury of the environment. Thread counts and all.

And that is exactly what this was with the French beauty brand Clarins.

And although, their products don’t quite work for my skin (we’ll come back to the skin topic in the latter part of this post. The entire branding experience was so worth every penny of the price tag.

 

Cherieby c (1)Cherieby c

 

So back to skin and some good ole’ beauty wisdom.

I’ve previously mentioned, the beauty space can feel a little clogged with information, but as I will hopefully explain, it is potentially vital information.

 

The skin problem guys.

I, after 25 strong years of guaranteed resilient skin, suffered a sort-of skin break-out, not acne, but still very serious for me.

I will go into detail to describe the details of this because with skincare the specifics matter.

After my Lagos trip and the odd issue here or there, my skin really started to suffer:

  • Dry sections of my face
  • Rashes / teeny tiny bumps all over my face
  • The odd pimple with no hormonal activity ( I was basically on my periods for two months, judging from my spots)

It kind of pains me to remember how really upset I was about this actually, I mean first world problems much? But perhaps more upsetting was not knowing where to start and feeling altogether very nervous about seeking the right help from beauty counters. Sales pitches and all.

 

 

But anyhow.

So the solutions.

SPECIFICALLY, the solutions against the issues my skin was presenting and, which have worked the most favourably have been a combination of switching up my routine and product, with more on the routine side.

Finding out / Getting help

As I have said the world of beauty advice is really packed full and this is a good thing.

I stuck to checking out people who had presented the same issues as I had, some of my favourite influencers and seeing what solutions they used on their skin. I used this avenue for most of my product recommendations.

In extremes, it obviously will pay to see a professional, a regular doctor to begin with and perhaps a dermatologist afterwards.

No-makeup (makeup)

By makeup I mean the flawlessly applied second face of foundation, we often rely upon for that extra glow and health in our faces.

Whilst not very difficult for me, it was still very awkward to not be able to cover up these problem areas of my skin. It felt like the first place most people look?!

So not to be too drastic, I would recommend fewer layers of foundation perhaps, or a simple mineral powder, or other plant-based foundation products.

Cleaning out

I realised that whilst some of those all time favourite products might be hard to part with.

This was actually my favourite plan to execute, I realised there was a problem somewhere and I was only going to figure it out through a process of elimination.

Simplicity is often key to begin with; this way you are more aware of the effect one product might be having on your skin without any interference from other products.

Vitamin – E

And finally, vitamin e.

So this is the only product plug really for the SPECIFIC skin issues I was presenting.

I felt like a lot of natural based products definitely came to my aid. And whilst they lack in some areas, for example, there isn’t the miracle overnight effect that I am used to from my former luxury beauty products.

But they did a lot to calm and heal my skin, granted this has been over an extended period of time.

And well dare I say it but beauty advice is actually up there on what a lot of us really need?

Both on the holistic side of things but also on the practical side of things so please, please, please guys do not leave this page without equally sharing some of your advice, it’ll help someone (me and the millions of others like me).

A poignant life-lesson of my being twenty-something

May – July is the usual western education ‘schools-out-season’, think exams, graduation, and holidays.

So we figured we’d take some time to get some life-styled learning in the mix. A sort-of continuation to that last ‘twenty-something’ post; as it was really my brother who influenced the direction of this, as he shared some of his completely natural growing-up anxieties. Specifically of ‘not knowing what comes next’.

You see, in my own not-so-long lived life, I’ve also been exactly preoccupied with the same anxieties as my brother, luckily in true fashion to being a little older (only a little older), I think it’s an anxiety that I have mostly gotten over and onto better things after.

But first, what is your greatest fear?

Well, mine is getting life wrong.

Now don’t worry, I got to think about mine for ages, so I could streamline it, as the more I thought about it the more I realised I had lots of fears.

Lots of fears, in that general ones like a natural disaster on the scale of ‘day after tomorrow’, alongside some deeply personal and maybe some little irrational ones like being the most underdressed.

Looking at fears comes up as I come to a point in my life where I realise that as much as we go through life, and take in from life, experiences from the outside to the inside, there is an equally important ecosystem of life that takes place in our thoughts even before we begin to act on them.

Madiba

Something on fear, Something on hope.

So let’s get personal.

I like to think I’m not usually afraid, but as I brought up earlier I do have my numerous fears. And my reasoning behind my not being afraid despite having these fears boils down to the fact that despite my fears, I will usually not make my decisions based on said fears.

I think most people are like that.

So for me, when I committed what I felt for a while was the greatest offence ever committed in the history of first-world millennial offences and against the knowledge of my patron saint  Michelle Obama. A definite re-living of one of my fears, getting bad grades just at the end of my spotless academic record, it was still pretty natural for me to pick up and just move on from it.

Don’t get me wrong I wasn’t very happy about it.

But I wasn’t afraid to go on. It later came as such a surprise, how much more affected I was in the days that followed by the constant slaps on the wrist I would get for refusing to be bowed down by this fear of bad exam grades, it seemed as though others were reinforcing that greatness of this my fear, and in my mind that left space for not a lot else.

I realise that whilst we might confront a fear in our actions, sometimes our mind still holds onto a slightly more subtle version of that fear in which we aren’t really free.

And that I feel that is the real trouble with fear, when nestled so deep in our minds that it doesn’t wait to present itself at some crossroads, or at the boundaries of a life changing decision, instead it does so in slowly chipping away and limiting what should really be our most open, and limitless weapon. And making our minds a little less free.

My solution? Make your mind a sanctuary, the one place that your wildest imaginations and most beautiful dreams come to life.

From your mind into your actions, the world will be a better place for it.

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p.s. Please try for the really cool, politically correct dreams, no world-domination. Signed the human people of earth who quite like sharing a.k.a we socialists

To my favourite twenty-something

Wait.

Is Solange in her twenties … 30? Oh great.

In that case, with Solange Knowles my new patron saint of snatching emotional edges, firmly out of my millennial top spot,

I can now reveal *drumroll please* that my – not so – little brother is, in fact, my favourite twenty-something. And he turns 23 today!

To those closest to me who’ve seen the largest part of this our familial, not really much of a choice, tightly knit bond, this won’t come as much of a surprise but for the rest of you here’s why my brother is truly my favourite.

For as many times as he clung to me like a fart as a toddler, struggling to pronounce my name, to beating me so easily when we had that one basketball and we’d try to reach the longest count of consecutive bounces; For as many times as he was so scared whenever I donned my mother’s hairnet as a face mask and ran around the house chasing him as a big bad scary monster; For as many times as he asked me ‘when is mummy coming back’ for that entire year my mother lived abroad without her bundles of joy; For as many times as he refused to talk back to our parents and I had to put on my advocate’s hat; For as many times as he let me become the little sister despite being the older sister.

As it turns out my – not so – little brother is effectively my oldest friend, my most loyal friend and my in so many ways life-saver friend. I wouldn’t really be the me that I love without some of my happiest memories and most are with my – not so – little brother.

Happy Birthday, Twerp!

 

 

n.b. even though this is a post exclusively dedicated to my brother, it’d be a complete loss to you to not introduce you to Solange Knowles in a deep and emotional way, so here’s a thing she wrote that was good, in-fact great, in-fact saintly.